Tuesday, May 4, 2021

Those Are Not Betty Davis Eyes

 

It has been a difficult few days, full of first world problems.

The voice of Ohms. The manager of the path of the beam. The audio of the GPS quit the other day.

Okay I was programing the route, and in a voice that was loud enough to be heard in a tunnel over the din of a semi on either side of me, came. “THE ROUTE IS BEING CALCLATED” It was so loud that people in boom cars stopped to hear what was next. What was next was me telling Ohms to use her inside voice.

Ohms has no inside voice and retaliated by shutting down the voice of the path of the beam.

It took me a day or two to notice, that there were no audio directions, but then I  wondered what happened. I hadn’t turned it off. I started going through the tv screen menus at 60 mph, pressing buttons, adjusting volumes. Nothing I was doing was restoring “The Voice”

In total desperation I phoned the nearest motor company outpost, and speaking to the service department, the fellow said they could probably look at it tomorrow, but I would need to call back tomorrow and speak to the people that work their tomorrow, as the fellow I was talking to today had no idea what was happening there tomorrow.

Its service like this that makes the motor company great.

I figured that the motor company service was yesterday, and I could probably fix it myself if I wasn’t trying to do it at 60 mph.

It was going to be major city traffic to get to the tulips of Mount Vernon so after programing the route I went through every screen, and finally found a unchecked box that said, “GPS AUDIO”, and Walla the voice was back. How the box got unchecked no one knows, but I can find it again now, maybe.

My other bout with technology was when I booked my room in Mount Vernon. I used one of them hotel apps, and about halfway there I realized that I did not select the correct dates.  I figured I would just go to the hotel and see what could be done.

Entering the hotel there was a big sign “Masks Required”

Self Explanatory

There were two women at the front desk when I walked in the door.  One wearing a mask, and one without.

The one without was clearly the one in charge and knew just what to do. She is also a graduate of the Tammy Fay Baker school of eye makeup, and she definitely graduated at the top of her class. Her eyes literally looked like she had applied a caterpillar that was dipped in bunker oil and then sprinkled with glitter.

Tammy Fay

Are Tammy eyes a thing? Or has Jim been here?

 She said I had to call the app people, but got right through to a human, who knew just what to do, and fixed the dates. She also sounded just like some other agent I have had to call recently. They both sounded like they were breathing helium. Is this a thing? Customer service people forced to breath helium, so they can be harder to understand.

Another mystery


Thanks for reading

 

 

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